Well, the Committee and I had a huge meeting concerning the Plea to Peter, and I, as the spokescoffeeperson, have decided to relate this to you for the possible inclusion on your website. You may wish to either edit this, or place it on a seperate page. In order to protect the innocent (or guilty) I'm not going to state exactly who said what...

Point 1:

First and foremost, as long as the music is good, the hair thing doesn't *really* matter, and we all still love the guy. However, we the fans, have the right to express our opinion, trivial as it may be, and even PG himself has stated that there may be a connection between hair and music, so perhaps our concern is legit.

Point 2:

Capt. Zero already pointed this fact out on the PG Survey, so I'm crediting him for this notion. He said that the bald look should be reserved for those who look intimidating in it. He's right...think of the men who look great bald: Patrick Stewart, Bruce Willis, Telly Savalas, heck, Tony Levin...they've always been tough, macho guys. PG just doesn't fit that type...he's a harmless fuzzball. Only now he's a fuzzless fuzzball. We see that he has two opitions: either grow back some hair, or start a bar brawl.

Point 3:

PG has always gone on and on in interviews about how one should accept one's self and people should try to overcome one's fears. By shaving his head, he has managed to undermine both sentiments. An explaination is in order here...

Everyone knew PG was getting older and balding for years and years. No one really had a big problem with this, except for PG, apparently. Actually, most people liked his various phases of bald-*ing*. Balding at an even pace looked natural for him. It suited him well. He wasn't too hairy (most folks didn't care for the aging hippie look he had at one point) and he wasn't cueball either...it was just a nice, comfortable middle ground. We all knew at some point he would become completely bald on his own, but it was important that it all came about naturally.

So after having a really nice one-inch cut, he goes nuts and shaves his head. What does this say about himself? He seems to want to prove that he's not afraid of being bald, but instead it only proves that he's afraid of *balding*. Instead of accepting his condition as is, he has be a control freak and pretend he has power over his fate by shaving his head in a "we have to destroy the village to save it" strategy, not to mention this is totally unfair to the fans who he's cheating out of seeing him in numerous nice comfortable phases of balding.

Point 4:

As writer Dave Barry has pointed out, Bald African-American men look bold and sexy. However, bald white men tend to resemble giant thumbs.

Point 5:

Somewhat related to Point 3...shaving his head demonstrates how PG is willing to jump to extremes. When he was balding, there was room for change. Completely bald however, is just so...*final*. There's nowhere to go from here. You can't do anything different with your look when you're completely bald...except for grow hair or wear a hair piece. Or paint your head in Real World colors...but us Solsburians wouldn't want to give him any stupid ideas...

Point 6:

We've always loved to make fun of Phil Collins for being bald. We can't now that Phil has more hair than Peter. Now we're forced to pick on Collins' thousands of other shortcomings instead. How can PG *do* this to us?!

Well, that's all for now...

Gabrielfully yours,

Mac Cat, Director of Coffee